Have you ever been really sticking to your daily routine and then "poof" it goes out the door!
You had your time for everything. It was going great until..................
You had the next baby, the teenager snuck out, then everyone got the stomach virus............
And, suddenly your routine is so hard to get back to.
Why is that?
Let me tell you, it's not the physical part that's hard, it's the mental fatigue, the feelings of not being in control, the thoughts that you are not managing.
It's the mindset that can creep into your already overtaxed Mamas' mind that is the real culprit and it can derail you for days, weeks, and sometimes months.
When routine goes out the window so does, health, exercise, the house, the kids, the spouse, and anything else in the mix. Going through the fast-food window seems like a really good idea when the kitchen is full of last night's plates and dishes. So how do you break the cycle and get back into a healthy routine?
Here are a few tips for you:
1. Get everyone involved.
If the house got out of order then everyone was part of that so get everyone together and allocate jobs to all to get it tidy, clean, and everything in place. When this happens at my house and suddenly we have a guest coming, everyone has to get on board. One person is not responsible for the household mess, or clean up. Besides, you can make a game of it, have small prizes for little ones, and a $ or two for the older ones. You might be surprised, they could enjoy it and have fun as well as make memories.
2. Make sure your mindset is right.
Kids are really great at mirrored behavior, as are spouses, friends, and anyone else you know. In other words when you are feeling frustrated and it's coming out in the form of a raised voice, or other actions that cause tension, then everyone around will mirror your behavior. Starting the clean-up project with the right attitude is 90% of the battle.
3. Plan to have some favorite fun time after.
Think about a fun activity that you can do after it's all cleaned up. Maybe a trip to the park, a favorite treat, anything as long as you don't make more mess before you get your routine established again. This is what I call good Mama bribery. Rewards are great incentives to teach your family to all pitch in whether it's cleaning up, cooking, yard work, the laundry, or any other chore that's part of daily life.
4. Make sure you have practical storage for kid's/teens stuff.
When my large family was young I soon worked out that with 8 under 7 I was going to have a lot of toys, videos, trikes, etc., and I needed storage so I wasn't tripping over everything. I ended up finding two large wicker boxes with lids that really did not cost a lot, looked nice, could be used for end tables, and held all the little stuff that's so hard to put away. I highly recommend something to keep the tidying up fun and easy.
And don't forget those young adults who need places to keep their "stuff" tidy, and most of all, able to be found! I can't tell you how many times my teens have had their clothes all over the place and got out of routine. Make sure they have a hamper for the dirty ones, and a clothes basket for clean ones to put away!
5. The power of praying.
So, one of my secret weapons with my kids was the power of prayer. Oh, and I don't mean going to my prayer closet, I mean if they were in a disagreement, for the want of a better word, I would get them together and have them join hands and pray for each other. Nothing like having to pray for that brother or sister is faster to get things back on track. A little God guilt never hurt anyone of my kids. It did make them think twice about picking on their brother or sister though! LOL! This works with your teens and young adults as well. Heck, prayer works for everyone!
Once you get your routine back then make sure you watch for the little things that can throw it right back out again. In the next blog, I'll give you some great daily habits to put in the day that will help you stay sane and healthy!
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Have an awesome week!
So, what is SANE???????
Well, I always say "insanity" is heredity, you get it from your kids, although I think these last couple of years have taken a toll on most Mamas.
Whether you've been homeschooling and working, or homeschooling and never getting a break, not being able to be as social as "normal," or feeling locked in, you've probably felt the shift in how feelings are flowing.
And, now things are starting to get going again, it's hard to find the new normal, the new sane, and get out of the sweatpants, and find out if you have been using food as a comfort just a tad too much!
With all of this craziness of the seemingly endless mask-wearing, non-socializing lifestyle comes fear. Fear of being ill, fear of not being enough for everyone, fear surrounding teaching your kids, fear of your marriage coming to a place of disarray because of close quarters and short tempers. Fear of the news, the numbers, what's coming next, and keeps you from being yourself, or what you once knew as yourself.
Fear comes in all forms and generally ends up with you feeding it unintentionally. Food, wine, binge-watching Netflix because of the lack of social interaction with your peers. It can make you overprotective of your kids, eat way more take-out than you should, and be frustrated as well as short-tempered.
So, what can you do as things begin to get back to what will become the "new normal?" Here are a few tips:
1. Let go of perfection.
Let's face it, this is not the time to even try to be the "perfect Mama!" If, and I do mean IF, there is such a thing. Perfection is FEAR! Yup, fear of failing, fear of not being enough, fear of not getting your home is house and garden LOL! Let perfection go, and the stress will ease up.
2. Having a schedule to manage the "unknown."
As a Mama of a very large family, routines and schedules are a must. In the last couple of years, all of that had to be flexible and schedules had to be reworked to fit what was happening, both known, and unknown. Kids feel way more secure with a routine, and when you have one in place, their behavior improves, and life gets to have more sanity and insanity!
3. Calming the storms.
As much as you can feel overwhelmed and frustrated, so can kids. In fact, your energy of anxiety, overwhelm, or frustration, will attract the same from your kids, and vice versa. When they are acting out if you can take a breath and stay calm, your energy will cause them to be calm as well. Sounds crazy? No. Two opposite energies cannot exist in the same space. So keep your sanity by breathing your way and theirs to calmness.
4. Emotions are waves.
All feelings are waves, felt internal, and cannot last forever. They will pass through and diminish if you are present, aware, and let them. Emotions are waves until there is an action that then escalates the feeling into an emotion. Emotions are feelings with actions. It's not great to hide your feelings as they tend to build up and then explode as an action-packed emotion. Let your kids know when you need a hug as well as comfort them when they need one.
5. Embrace every opportunity.
Kids are resilient, but they have feelings and emotions. They have personalities, and if yours are anything like mine, they are all different. Take every opportunity to make each child know they are understood, loved, and wanted. Just like you can have thoughts of rejection, unworthiness, and loneliness, your kids can have those too.
Let them know you're their cheerleader as well as their Mama.
Here's my signature program if you'd like to check that out. It's all about being Sane and Healthy! CLICK HERE
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That's it for now! Give yourself some love today!
Okie dokie! It's nearly February!
The so called month of love................
Valentine's Day!
Red roses, chocolates, diamonds, and anything else you can think of!
I'm going to go here and talk about the different scenarios for this particular holiday......
One is you're happily coupled, meaning, married, betrothed, but together with your mate.
Two is you're unhappily coupled..........with all that comes with that........
And three you're alone. No partner, just you and friends.
In every one of these situations, there is love, great love, to be experienced and built upon.
I know you are going, well, I can't see that, but let's just take a step back and look at a few things I could mention that have worked in my forty-two years of amazing marriage with my awesome hubby!
First and foremost there is the Platinum Rule. This goes for couples and for singles.
For couples? You treat your partner better than yourself, and always put them first. Applies to both partners.
For singles? You treat yourself better than anyone else and make sure you're not saying Yes when you should be saying NO!
When you are already in a harmonious relationship, this Platinum rule will take your marriage, or partnership to a much greater level. Imagine putting each others needs ahead of your own. Do you know how good that feels?💖
And, even if it is only one-sided to start off, it will change the dynamics. There will be more kindness, pleasure, and all the good feels.
Now, if the relationship is a little rocky, applying the Platinum rule is going to take this out of rocky to a more stable, friendly, and kind place. It's hard to argue when someone is intentionally being kind and looking after you. When that significant other has cooked a favorite meal, or put candles on the table, opened a bottle of wine, and laid out the cheese and crackers! 💖
Mending relationships has to start somewhere so why not with you? You'll be surprised how that tension eases when there's loving kindness involved.
And, so you're single.............for whatever reason. Well, there's no need not to celebrate yourself, your achievements, and give yourself some self-care/love. ❤️
Intentional loving kindness will melt the ice, the tension, the argument, and the resistance, as long as you can let go of any resistance you feel. Taking the first step and letting go of any negative feelings whether that's with a partner or yourself is the road to not only living a better life, having a better relationship, but to the art of "Having It All."
You see you already have the power of love living within you. Tap into that power and let it loose!
You also have the power within you to change your feelings when they don't align with how you want to feel. Take a moment and start thinking on better things. When you start thinking of a better situation, not apportioning blame, not assuming you know what the other person is thinking, then the feeling will change. When you begin to look for the good, the feeling will change, and the relationship will change.
Deliberately creating what you want means you focus on what you want the outcome to be, even in relationships. Bringing good, happy, wonderful, memories to mind, changes how you think and you feel.
Using a Young Living emotional Essential Oil will help make this work better and faster. If you don't know about those then book a coffee chat with me and I'll be happy to help you.
Changing our feelings, and emotions is key to good relationships.
Speaking and acting with kindness is key to good relationships.
Applying the Platinum rule is key to GREAT relationships.
If this speaks to you please book a free virtual call with me today! Here's the LINK!
And, please accept my gift to you, 5 Steps to Change. Get it HERE!
Our brain is powerful!
It can be logical, practical, creative, intuitive, create thoughts, powerful, and silent.
We have a thinking part, (the left brain,) and a feeling part, (the right brain.)
And when they come together to be single-minded, we have power, the ability to act, make huge changes in our lives, be healthy, peaceful, and joyous.
Now, ask yourself, how often are you single-minded?
Most of the time, if you're like me, I am struggling with my left and right brain having a tug of war!
I write a list of your desires, goals, dreams, and then the feelings of doubt, fear, unworthiness, and self-sabotage start to make those things I really want seem almost impossible.
So, then the buffering comes in.
"What's buffering" you may ask.
It's all the things you do that stop you from consciously putting the two sides of your brain together and get it done.
When you know that you need to write that schedule for next week or food prep so you won't cheat, or put your latest blog, or offer out there for people to see, you sidetrack yourself. You watch some rubbish TV or eat a bag of chips, scroll through social media, anything but put in the work to get the desires of your heart.
Why does this happen, and why does it happen so often?
Because really the brain thinks it's protecting us from doing something uncomfortable.
And, to intentionally create the desires of your heart requires you to get uncomfortable.
Life changes, which come from changing feelings, and thoughts, require single-mindedness. Single-mindedness requires the conscious effort to bring both sides of the brain into harmony. To a single mind.
A mind that is powerful, and can create all of the things you wish to have.
Learning to be single-minded takes being mindful. Practicing mindfulness. Daily, hourly, every time you feel distracted from your purpose.
Mindful of thoughts.
Mindful of words.
Mindful of feelings.
When we feel one thing, and think the same one thing, we are using our whole brain.
We are no longer at war inside, we are no longer double-minded, we are single-minded on that one thing.
And_that_is_mind_blowing!
To put it simply, to create your success, your desires, your goals, you need to agree with both sides of your brain.
SINGLE-MINDEDNESS
BOOM!
Have more "BOOM" moments in your life!
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Well, we all have New Year's resolutions right?
I can say for myself that I usually do and they are different goals for different parts of my life. I actually love to look back at my diary and see what I wrote last year and how did that all go? I dreaded doing that this year because I really thought we would be through with this pandemic, and somehow magically biz and life would resume to somewhat what they looked like before.
Well, I'm pretty sure some of you can agree that 2021 seemed like a long 2020, and no, for the most part, things did not pan out like they used to. I found myself pivoting, procrastinating, putting plans in place to find that people weren't ready to socialize, and feeling like life in some ways was great, but in other areas seemed to slide down the rabbit hole.
I'm not one to give up, and I know for sure you aren't, so as the seasons flowed through I realized I needed to stop swimming upstream and go with the flow. Finding the flow was a bit tricky, but I knew it was out there if I just persisted, and find it I did.
Right now we are in the Holiday season where stress, and overwhelm can get us if we let it. It's a season of too much food where we are tempted to overeat, or sometimes overdrink, in the spirit of being merry, and if we go too much with that flow our New Year's resolution will include losing the Christmas season's extra 10lb!
My resolutions for the next year have been tweaked and changed a little. Oh, there'll be the usual biz goals, personal, spiritual, and growth goals, and also the goal to go with the flow of things. Allow for the unexpected, give time to rest, and recuperate, make time for fun, laughter, prayer, and meditation, so life looks a little more balanced.
This year, I've lost some dear friends, not just to the pandemic, but to stress, resulting in lives being ended too soon. It's made me stop and think about what life is really for. Being abundant in all areas of my life, not just slogging away for finances, goals, cleaning, washing, cooking (unless I'm enjoying that,) making sure of my physical fitness, and attending to my quiet times as in prayer, and meditation.
This next year my motto is New Year, New You!
Did you find yourself in a similar situation?
What would you like to find that would transform your New Year into a New You?
What would you like to find that would transform your New Year into a New You?
Most women I know are wanting to finally get their ideal body, and their ideal mindset to enable them to not worry about always trying to fit into those jeans that really look great, and are just a bit too tight.
We can all go on diets, and I have done that just like you probably have, and I've found that to be tedious, stressful, and in the end, unsuccessful. When I learned that to find my ideal body and keep it revolved around my mind, and mindfulness, that's when I found and kept the body that has served me well.
I have a wonderful group that is going to be full-on in the New Year as well! There will be so much for you to grab, use, and get weightless! Go join this FB group right now! Whole Health, The Weightless School. https://www.facebook.com/groups/wholehealththeweightlesschool
If you would like to chat with me about how you can ditch the diet and feel comfortable, attractive, and sexy in your skin, then go here and book a call with me. Or click on this link:
https://my.timetrade.com/book/VGH76
And, please accept my free gift to you, Six Ways to Fight Stress Fast! Just click HERE! Or follow this link:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/fivpddlmjnr8cmy/Six-Ways-To-Fight-Stress-Fast.pdf?dl=0
Thanks for reading, grab that free resource and book a call!
